Santa Speaks

From an apparently authentic interview with Santa Claus. I mean, it was printed in a paper, so it has to be real, doesn't it?

Q: Do you have any nut allergies or are you lactose intolerant?

A: No! Ho Ho Ho! But I won’t eat the peanut butter cookies right away. I take them home and eat them there so that I don’t contaminate other cookies - just in case someone else is allergic!